What moms of kids with special needs wish you knew

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Having a child with special needs sets you apart from other mothers. It shouldn’t, but it does. It’s like being part of a club you didn’t ask to join — one where non-members don’t always understand what happens at the meetings. Source: Shutterstock

by Amanda Morin, popsugar.com February 20, 2013

Moms who are in the club truly wish those outside it could understand. Here’s what they wish other moms knew, as explained by Circle of Moms members whose kids’ special conditions run the gamut from autism to being wheelchair bound.

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1. We’re as Normal as You Are
Moms of kids with special needs are funny. We’re snarky. We like to go out and gossip just as much as you do. Mom Judy says what she really wants is friendship, not pity. Having a child with special needs doesn’t change our need to be one of the girls, so invite us out for drinks or dinner!

2. We’re Jealous of How Normal Your Life Seems
We know that everybody has stuff going on in their lives, but sometimes it seems like your stuff is so much easier to deal with than our stuff. As awful as it sounds, we are, like one member (screen name: “Firebird Bedard”) explains, sometimes jealous that your child has met his developmental milestones or that your child is healthy or even just, as mom Danielle C. so simply puts it, jealous you don’t have to go through this.

3. Sometimes We Feel Like Terrible Moms
Having a child with special needs doesn’t mean we’re automatically more patient than other moms. Sometimes we just lose it. Even though most of us know that mom Stacey M. is right when she says losing it “happens to every parent, even those without children with special needs,” knowing that our kids can’t control the behavior that drove us over the edge makes us feel like horrible moms.

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